… Your sweetie says, “Let’s go upstairs and make love” and you answer, “Pick one, I can’t do both!”

… Your friends compliment you on your new alligator shoes and you’re barefoot.

… A sexy babe catches your fancy and your pacemaker opens the garage door.

… Going bra-less pulls all the wrinkles out of your face.

… You don’t care where your spouse goes, just as long as you don’t have to go along.

… You are cautioned to slow down by the doctor instead of by the police.

… “Getting a little action” means I don’t need to take any fibre today.

… “Getting lucky” means you find your car in the parking lot.

… An “all-nighter” means not getting up to pee.

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